May 27 2008
Yeah, But Does He Know When To Double Down?
My friend Kyle the hat stealer, you remember him, just emailed me pictures of his son’s first trip to the horse track. He told me that the little guy hit the daily double for $158 and won $323 on a quinella. I suggested getting the tyke a golf pencil and teaching him lotto. We’ll see. If his luck holds, maybe the little guy will be sending me a check for 10% of their lotto millions. You know, consulting fees and all. Can a trip to Vegas be too far away? I think not. If you’re on a winning streak, you gotta stick with it; so Kyle, whatever you do, don’t change that kids diaper. It’s bad luck.
*This is not a picture of Kyle’s baby. His baby prefers Mandalay Bay, and wouldn’t be caught dead in a newborn baby exploiting Golden Palace dot com beanie*
I think a golf pencil would be too big. For a baby, a golf pencil is really kinda long. So get a golf pencil, and then sharpen it down until it is about an inch long. THEN he’ll be ready.
(NukeDad) Good point Christine. Maybe we could get him one of those Barbie pencils, then he’d be ready for college!
Can he pimp him out? I can send him my lotto cards and send 10% of my winnings if he hits.. Mabye get the kid a bookie line?
(NukeDad) That could work. His middle name is Soprano, you know.
Kims last blog post..A Mommy Blessing- May 26 2007
maybe rubbing his head brings luck.
(NukeDad) I think it’s the horseshoe they have hanging around his neck on a chain.
Audubon Rons last blog post..It’s the Little Things
I tried this with my psychic kid…he kept predicting stuff, but as soon as I let him pick lottery numbers, his streak ended. Figures.
(NukeDad) Looks like Cosmo & Wanda must have gotten ahold of him and made him read “Da Rulz”.
Momo Falis last blog post..There’s No Napalm In The Air
I thought I was nuts for having my son wear shirts that have our painting company logo on them. This guy is a bit crazier than me. Keep up the good writing.
(NukeDad) You’re keeping it in the family. Golden Palace is looking for ad space on your kids’ noggin’. That’s not my friends baby, though. Thanks!
ROFL! Yup, definitely don’t change his diaper.
While in Vegas,..what about craps?
(NukeDad) Yea Sandy! I was hoping someone would see the open door! That’s why you don’t change the diaper, Kyle, cuz it’ll come in handy when you’re shooting craps!
Sandy (Momisodes)s last blog post..One-Sided
Keep him away from the poker tables. His luck may change.
(NukeDad) I don’t think his hands are big enough to hold the cards anyway.
soge shirtss last blog post..Choose your own adventure haikus
Hello gang,
Kyle the hat stealer here. Well, you guys may think it sounds funny, but the boy had a blast checking out the huge animals. He loved going down to the paddock and was absolutely bewildered by the HUGE horsies.
My monster-in-law breeds and races horses so we have a box that is quiet for the boy to catch some sleep when he gets tired (and privacy to change and feed). Honestly, he had a blast with the horsies and jockeys in the paddock area however. He likes the jockeys, they’re just about his size so he does not feel threatened.
(NukeDad) “The jockeys are just about his size?” Dude, no need to be racist!
Racist? Where did that come from?
(NukeDad) Racist, discriminatory, xenophobic, whatever; You called jockeys babies, man! Or said your baby was as big as a jockey, or whatever….just deal with it.
Dude, Jockeys ares small. Stating the obvious does not make me discrimnatory, just honest. I am not sure, but I believe some states require them to ride in car seats…
(NukeDad) car seats? CAR SEATS? Are you serious? Why don’t you just run through the jockey club next time your at the track and yell “What’s up, shorty?”, and see what kind of reaction you get. Your such a jockeyophobe. Jockey’s are people too. Well, if one stood on another’s shoulders.